if I could do anything…

My boys have been in trouble.


A lot.


It seems that we spend a fair amount of time covering ground that we’ve already covered, and from what I hear, this is all part of growing up and parenting.  Every kid has their own learning curve, and all of mine seem to have extra long ones.

Everything with the boys seems so much harder.  Perhaps it’s because everything with them is new.  Perspective really does change everything...
 

Isaac 3 1/2 and Nate 3

I remember during their shared season of tantrums, feeling that it would never end.  That they’d be 15 and still stomping their feet and throwing their toys across the room whenever they didn’t get their way.  Of course now, I know better.  That season, though hard, had an end to it, and now that my littlest is in it I don’t feel quite so overwhelmed by it.  Exhausted, sure, but not overwhelmed.

What’s hardest for me is reigning in my “forward thinking'”.  It’s so easy to let your worries take your thoughts down a long and winding road that you don’t want to see your kids heading toward. 

“casting down imaginations, and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ..”

-2 Corinthians 10:5

I am just as much a work in progress as they are.  I am still learning patience, how to trust in the Lord, and how to daily receive and give grace.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding.
 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He will make your paths straight.” 

-Proverbs 3: 5-6

 

This morning I gave Nate a writing assignment titled, “If I could do anything or go anywhere this weekend…”



He happily penned a lengthy and detailed description of his day, and this is some of what he wrote:


Really?!


If you could go anywhere or do anything in the whole wide world, you’d stay here with us and do those normal, everyday things? 





Even though he’s been in a slew of trouble, and even though I’ve been up more nights than I can count worrying about his future, his choices, and his legacy, he had this one thing to share with me that jolted me back into reality:


He needs time with me. 


Time to play, time for fun, time for togetherness.  Those things have been hard to come by lately.  Honestly, they are hard things to hand out when you spend so much time worrying about stopping a misbehavior and guiding, whether gentle or not, toward a particular path.


I don’t know how much longer, or how much harder, I will be asked to work through this challenging phase.  Actually, it’s probably better for me not to think too much about it.  Parenting is hard work and heart work, and in the scheme of things, I’m not even half way through the trenches.


One thing I do know is this: 

I’ve got a picnic to pack.

A movie to rent. 

Popcorn and cookies to make. 

And a weekend full of these four little blessings!



Happy Weekend!


What are your plans?